On being the Hermit, chronic illness, and living by myself for the first time
Plus, trans people under attack; and making butter from scratch
I got the keys to my new flat, Lavender Oasis, at the end of January, and after a busy month of getting the flat ready (painting, putting in floors, getting appliances and furniture) with lots of help from friends, I moved here in March.
Since then, the archetype of the Hermit—and the tarot card associated with it—has really resonated with me. So I thought I’d use my first post here after my introductory post to explore that. Afterwards, I’ll talk a little bit about trans people being under attack by the new Labour government and what you can do about it, as well as my recent kitchen experiment of making butter from scratch.
The Hermit is the ninth card of the Major Arcana. In the Rider-Waite-Smith deck, the Hermit is portrayed as a bearded man in a hooded robe, standing upright, his head bowed forward. He is holding a lantern in front of him, a six-pointed star held within it, as well as a staff or walking stick in his other hand. He is standing on what looks to be a mountain peak, with other mountains on the horizon below him. The Hermit is often associated with the analytical sign of Virgo (which is also my moon sign, in the 4th house of home and the family), so I’m going to take a page from that and look in turn at each of those major symbols present in the card—the solitary figure, the staff, the lantern and the mountain peak—and what each of them mean for me at the moment.
Looking at the solitary figure of the Hermit, I'm first going to say that despite the depiction in the RWS version of this card (and in the archetypal figure that may come to mind when you think of a hermit), the hermit does not have to be either male or elderly. The most important thing about the card, rather, is its solitude.
What does solitude mean for me at the moment? I’m living by myself for the first time in my life, most of the time with only the companionship of my cat Snowball and friends and family connected through the internet. It’s also been years since I’ve dated anyone or been in a relationship, and while I would love a cute lesbian relationship, I am at peace with being single for now. In general, the word I would use to describe this solitude is peaceful. My space is my own, I can do as I please, I have the time and space I need to rest, I have the quiet I need to let myself think. While I can feel lonely at times, as well as overwhelmed and depressed by outside events, I am for the most part in a really good place mentally and emotionally.
The next aspect of the Hermit I’d like to talk about is the staff or walking stick. I’m disabled and use a walking stick to help me get out and about (pending being able to afford a wheelchair that will allow me to be more mobile), so this definitely resonates with me. The hermit’s walking stick to me represents the support they have, and I am in a very privileged position of generally having the support I need. For me this includes friends and community who are there for me (as I try to be there for them), Snowball to keep me company and give me plenty of cuddles, as well as the government social security and council house that mean I’m not struggling to survive as a chronically ill person unable to work a usual job. I’m also thinking about how the word “staff” in English can refer both to a walking stick and the people who support you; and how in Hebrew the word “mateh” can refer to a walking stick as well as a tribe, and comes from a root meaning “to stretch out”. And of course, in the tarot, a staff corresponds to the suit of Wands.
Next is the Hermit’s lantern, lighting the path ahead. What do I have to guide me? I have the natural world, the cycles of the moon and the seasons. I have Judaism (here it feels very appropriate that the lantern in the RWS and many other versions of the card is a six-pointed star, like the Jewish Star of David), and the millenia of wisdom it holds. I have my own personal experience, including navigating the world as a queer, autistic, disabled, trans woman, along with my ability to listen to those who don’t share my experience. I have my beliefs in justice, the importance of community, and building a better world. I also have tarot as a tool for guidance and self-reflection, as well as helping others.
Finally, the mountain peak the hermit stands upon could represent achievements and accomplishments. I feel like there’s so much I’ve accomplished even in just the last few years. I’ve come to terms emotionally with the chronic illness I’m living with, I’ve moved to a new city (Edinburgh, after living for 6 years in Glasgow) and made a life and community for myself here, I’ve navigated benefits systems and social housing bureaucracy and the medical system (in terms of both trans health care and chronic illness) to get the support I need, I’ve completed my conversion to Judaism, I’ve lived through a pandemic (which is still with us) and in a world that is broken in so many ways. I think one of my biggest achievements is my ability to cultivate joy in the face of everything. All of these are absolutely worth celebrating, and are certainly on my mind as I approach my 30th birthday this Autumn (and, astrologically speaking, am in the period of my Saturn return).
Below are some questions you can reflect on if you’re looking to explore the Hermit for yourself. Alternately, you can do this as a tarot spread, either drawing cards randomly or flipping through the deck face-up and seeing which cards resonate with you for each of the different questions.
The Solitary Figure: What does solitude mean to you?
The Staff: Who or what supports you?
The Lantern: What guides you?
The Mountain Peak: What have you achieved?
Trans people under attack from Keir Starmer, Wes Streeting and the Labour government—please write to your MP
CW: transphobia, suicide, murder
It’s a really scary time to be a trans person in the UK. There is so much hate against and misinformation being spread about the trans and nonbinary community, much of it being stirred up by the media, figures like J.K. Rowling, and a number of political figures from across the political spectrum.
Labour have come to power under the leadership of Keir Starmer, and look set to make things even worse. Wes Streeting, a vocal transphobe, has said he will ban trans people from single-sex wards in hospitals, and more recently that he will make permanent the ban on puberty blockers for trans youth (a completely safe and reversible medical treatment which prevents trans youth from going through the wrong puberty before they are able to go on hormone replacement therapy).
Right before the election, the now Prime Minister Keir Starmer also made some very worrying statements, including that he would not reverse a Conservative rule banning “gender ideology” from schools, including support for a minor’s social transition; and that he believes trans people shouldn’t use the public toilets corresponding to their lived gender. Additionally, the Labour leadership has bent over backwards to meet with J.K. Rowling, a woman who has made her entire personality into using her platform and wealth to attack trans people.
All of these are incredibly scary, and will have horrible implications on trans peoples’ health and wellbeing (including greater likelihood of trans people taking their own lives or being murdered). I urge you to write to your MP telling them how important these issues are to you, giving evidence-based arguments, and asking them to support trans people on these and other issues. I wrote this email to my new Labour MP last week. Here’s some information on contacting your MP, and you can find your MP and their contact details here.
Additionally, please sign relevant petitions here (petitions are currently paused until the House of Commons sets up a new Petitions Committee), and complete relevant government consultations (one just ended about Relationships and Sex Education, including the ban on “gender ideology”, and there should be one soon on the ban on puberty blockers).
In the kitchen: making butter from cream
I recently made the switch from being vegan 10 years to being pescetarian, and I’ve been having a lot of fun learning how to use ingredients in different ways.
After learning to make mayonnaise from an egg yolk and a bunch of oil, a whisk, and plenty of patience; this week I tried making butter from cream. (I also got myself an electric whisk to make the process quicker.) It’s amazing how easy it is to make from scratch!
I started with some double cream (you can also use heavy cream or whipping cream, but double cream has the highest proportion of fat). I then used my electric whisk to whip it into whipped cream and then further until it solidified (you can also stick it in a jar and shake it continuously for about 15 minutes, or faster if you have a marble or two in the jar).
I then put the solidified cream in a cheesecloth over a bowl and squeezed as much liquid as I could out of it (this is buttermilk, and you want to get as much of it out of the butter as possible as it goes rancid quickly). I then rinsed the butter with some water to get any last buttermilk off, and then I was done! I had some homemade butter, which is perfect on my sourdough bread, or in any recipe that calls for butter.